I have lost yet another loved one to cancer. Someone so kind and gentle, I just can't figure out why God would have put her through such pain and suffering. The Lord works in mysterious ways indeed.
At times like this many people turn to religion for guidance, consolation and hope. Just as many seem to turn away from religion, asking the question, what kind of God would let this happen? I am often torn between these two opposing views.
First and foremost I need to turn to something or someone for solace. There is a certain comfort in the traditions of the church, the solidity projected by most faiths. Having the good Reverend spout the usual platitudes can sometimes reach through the numbness and pain you feel over the loss of someone so dear.
But there is also an element of anger at work here. How and why would any God let this happen? What possible purpose could it serve? Is there even a God up there watching over us with some kind of plan for each and every one of our lives???
Which brings us to the biggest debate of all, that between faith and reason.
Having been brought up in parochial schools, saturated with Lutheran dogma since the age of 3, I have a very hard time separating out what I may feel in my heart and soul, and what the reasoning part of my brain is trying to tell me. Many people, as they age, find that doubt enters into the picture and lingers for many years. I keep praying that all my doubts will end, that the certainty that I felt in my youth will return and I will see death as just part of the greater good. That the soul of my loved one is in a better place, and this temporary stop we call life on earth, is over.
You wonder sometimes who is better off. Those shallow people who just simply believe and do not even bring reason into the picture, or those of us torn apart by a questioning mind. They seem to be much happier than we are, but are they better off? Sometimes I even wish that I did not always have to think quite so much. What and where exactly has it gotten me?
As I say goodbye to my loved one tomorrow I will try to think only that she is in a better place, with the angels, with her loved ones who have also passed, and that they are sitting on a cloud somewhere looking down at all the suffering here on earth and rejoicing in their good fortune, to have finally made it to the promised land. Sometimes when the pain becomes more than we can bear, that may be the only solace we have.
At times like this many people turn to religion for guidance, consolation and hope. Just as many seem to turn away from religion, asking the question, what kind of God would let this happen? I am often torn between these two opposing views.
First and foremost I need to turn to something or someone for solace. There is a certain comfort in the traditions of the church, the solidity projected by most faiths. Having the good Reverend spout the usual platitudes can sometimes reach through the numbness and pain you feel over the loss of someone so dear.
But there is also an element of anger at work here. How and why would any God let this happen? What possible purpose could it serve? Is there even a God up there watching over us with some kind of plan for each and every one of our lives???
Which brings us to the biggest debate of all, that between faith and reason.
Having been brought up in parochial schools, saturated with Lutheran dogma since the age of 3, I have a very hard time separating out what I may feel in my heart and soul, and what the reasoning part of my brain is trying to tell me. Many people, as they age, find that doubt enters into the picture and lingers for many years. I keep praying that all my doubts will end, that the certainty that I felt in my youth will return and I will see death as just part of the greater good. That the soul of my loved one is in a better place, and this temporary stop we call life on earth, is over.
You wonder sometimes who is better off. Those shallow people who just simply believe and do not even bring reason into the picture, or those of us torn apart by a questioning mind. They seem to be much happier than we are, but are they better off? Sometimes I even wish that I did not always have to think quite so much. What and where exactly has it gotten me?
As I say goodbye to my loved one tomorrow I will try to think only that she is in a better place, with the angels, with her loved ones who have also passed, and that they are sitting on a cloud somewhere looking down at all the suffering here on earth and rejoicing in their good fortune, to have finally made it to the promised land. Sometimes when the pain becomes more than we can bear, that may be the only solace we have.
