Gay Marriage Equality

As a man who came of age in the 1970's and witnessed all the changes then, I still marvel at all we have accomplished so far in the century.  I know we have a long way to go, but when I was just coming out, the idea of gay marriage was no where to be found, not even in my imagination.

That is one great benefit that the next generation will have.  The ideas in their dreams will not start out stifled.  They know that they can have the white picket fence, the 2.5 kids and the dog (if they want it) and someone to love them the rest of their lives.  I hope that this helps them to grow up in a more positive light, not thinking themselves inferior beings not deserving of marriage (much like slaves and inter-racial couples were).

In 1940 there were 31 states in the US that had laws on the books making inter-racial marriage illegal.  Today there are 31 states that have constitutional bans against gay marriage equality.  It wasn't until 1967 that those inter-racial marriage laws were changed, and then only by the Supreme Court.  70% of those polled (in the US) at the time thought that inter-racial marriage was wrong.  We seem to be changing minds a little faster then that, but we still have the rest of the world to work on.

Don't even get me started on Russia.  First they want to ban gays even talking about homosexuality to anyone under 18.  Now the Russian Army thinks they have a way of finding out if their soldiers or recruits are gay.  The gays will be the ones with the tattoos on their penises.  The Iron Curtain may have fallen, but I think it may have fallen on some of the Russian leaders' heads.

Let us pray for our gay brothers and sisters throughout the world as they struggle for even the most basic human rights.  And let us also pray that our country will keep moving forward until a time when the promise of equality found in the Constitution will apply to all of us.

The Gay Dichotomy

For many years now there has been a largely unspoken division among gay men. Many gay men are not comfortable around especially effeminate men, and don't often understand how the transgendered fit into our movement. I have struggled with these issues myself for a long time and I can't say I have come up with any concrete solutions.

Every time I see a Carson Kressley or a Perez Hilton on television, I just want to cringe. They seem to personify the worst gay stereotype there is. Bitchy, queeny, mean and after anything in pants, especially a straight man. Every time I see an ad for any of Rupaul's drag shows, I also cringe. I don't understand why these type of men are so dominant in the mainstream and even the gay media. It's as if all gay men want to be women, or as close as they can get.

I'm not saying anyone at anytime should be harassed or marginalized for being different. I just don't understand why the bitchiness always has to be there. I think that is the thing that turns many gay and straight men off the most. I have many friends who are gentle or effeminate, but very kind at heart. They are often the kind of people you want to surround yourself with. Good and kindhearted people. I don't understand why anyone would ever be bothered or feel threatened by them.

Underlying this whole discussion is the idea that to be gay one is naturally effeminate. And that being masculine is somehow considered straight-acting. This is so far from the truth. I know many effeminate straight guys, and many hyper-masculine gay men. I think the only thing that defines a man as homosexual, is that he wants to have sex or a relationship with another man. Then there are the men who just want the sex, but never the relationship. We call those guys toe-tapping senators from Idaho.

Telling someone who is gay that they have internalized homophobia because they don't like being around bitchy queens is ridiculous. It is not an innate characteristic of gay men to be effeminate. It seems to me to be more of a subcultural expectation. That somehow inside every gay man is a flamer just waiting to be set free. I have no such feelings, and most of the gay men I know don't either.

Then there is the transgendered issue. How the issue of gender identity became a part of the gay rights movement is beyond me. Sexual orientation is a simpler and more readily understood concept. Changing one's gender is far more jarring for most people. Both the one transitioning and those around them. I cannot imagine what the transgendered have to go through. They are treated the worst by society. Even by many gays. Maybe as the gay rights movement was being born and the drag queens were the first to fight back, that got mixed up with the transgendered issue (a totally different concept).

So what are we to make of all this internecine confusion? I think we are in the middle of a subcultural war here in America. Anyone who dares to speak against the gay orthodoxy is often criticized and marginalized. Even though we are fighting for tolerance, we seem intolerant of those who don't tow the party line. There is more than one way to be gay. If most gays don't understand why the media has made the negative gay stereotype the norm again, I have to join in their argument. Maybe that is because straights are only comfortable with what they have seen in the past, and can't grasp the fact that most gay men are just regular guys? Not bitchy, or mean or prissy.

I would like to see a more balanced portrayal of gay men in the gay and mainstream media. The gay joke shorthand always seems to involve some gay man getting in touch with his inner girl. Using the feminine pronoun and calling each other girlfriend. It was fun at first (twenty years ago), but now it seems that everyone believes that's all gay men can and want to be. This kind of thinking diminishes us all.

Click on the title box of this entry to find an interesting link about gays everywhere.

Iowa high court strikes down same-sex marriage ban - CNN.com

Now why can’t the California Supreme Court use the same logic and say that their ban violates the equal protection clause of their constitution as well?  And this was a unanimous vote in Iowa.  A proudly open-minded mid-western state.  God I hope this sticks.

Iowa high court strikes down same-sex marriage ban - CNN.com

Vermont House OKs gay marriage | News Story on 365gay.com

I know they needed 100 votes to get a veto proof majority, and they only got 95.  But some members of the state house said they would vote in favor of same sex marriage if it came down to getting it past the governor’s veto.

And how did Vermont end up with a Republican governor when the dems have such a large majority in both state houses?  And if they had to have a Republican governor, you think being from Vermont he would at least be a moderate.

It should be very interesting to see how this turns out.

Vermont House OKs gay marriage | News Story on 365gay.com

Becoming An Obama Nation

I know we haven't really talked much about the current political situation as regards the presidential race. I was for Hillary, and I am now switching over to Obama. It is not that I ever disliked him, it's just that there is so much covert racism in the country, that he steps out of the box with that burden tied to his leg.

I did enjoy watching him overseas this past week. He went toe-to-toe with world leaders and came out looking like a rock star. Not too bad for the junior senator from Illinois. Pissed McCain off to no end. He couldn't even get six people to come together to hear him speak at a German restaurant in Columbus. It is not that he is a bad guy, it is just that the independent John McCain we all loved died when he began running for president. He had to cater to his base, and that just turned me off right there. As John Stewart put it, he has gone over to the dark side.

I came up with a great idea for an ad from MoveOn.org. They could show the past eight years worth of political and international blunders from the Bush White House, then show the future with another Republican in the White House. Then call that twelve year period the McBush presidency. Then say, don't vote for more McBush, vote for a change in leadership, vote Obama. Someone has proably already thought of this and I just haven't been paying attention. I am trying to keep up.

I see the price of gas is staying below $4 a gallon this week. At least here in southeast Michigan. I hope this continues for a while. The whole country (and the world) could use a break right now. I know that China and India subsidize the price of gasoline in their countries, so the price of oil hasn't really hit the common folk there yet. But everywhere else in the world, it is getting increasingly more difficult to live. In Europe, the price of gasoline is twice what it is here. Not that that is new, but $9 a gallon for gas makes me feel like I'm getting a bargain over here. They do pay a lot more in tax per gallon than we do, but boy-oh-boy, that's a lot of money for a gallon of gas.

We have less than 100 days until the election and I'm sure it is going to be a roller coaster ride all the way.

The Crusades

Last night I watched the first part of the PBS series, America at a Crossroads. The series deals with how and why the Middle East has become such a large part of our lives. The first episode dealt with Osama and the birth of his extremist movement. The most alarming part was how we played into Osama's hands with our invasion of Iraq.

After our attack on the Taliban in Afghanistan, Osama and his gang were at their lowest point ever. We had world opinion on our side because of 9/11, and because of the world's disgust with what the Taliban had done to Afghanistan. Then, out of the blue, we invade Iraq.

Now the world had turned on us, Iraq is full of death and destruction, for our forces, and for the Iraqis. The Bush administration thinks that the only way out is through military intervention. They have no plan B. Anyone with half a brain can see that there has to be a political component to this, if we are ever to get our forces out of there, and if Iraq will ever become a stable democracy.

Nancy Pelosi has at least tried talking to the Syrians. Some Republicans from Congress went to Syria the week before, but they did not seem to get any media attention. I think both parties, outside of the White House, see that there must be another way out. Sending more and more of our children there to die is not the answer.

The most frightening thing about the show was the depth and breadth of the hatred the Islamists feel for Americans, and all of Western Culture. They still call us the Crusaders, and plan our downfall by bankrupting our economies through constant war in Muslim countries. So far their plan is working. We can only hope that when someone smarter gets in the White House, that we will find a way out without turning the Middle East into a powder keg.

The real answer is, of course, to find alternate sources of energy and to leave the Middle East to its own devices. Right now, everything that happens there affects the price of fuel, and soon natural gas. We need to stop our reliance on this area, and Bush is right about that. The government needs to make a more concerted effort to find sources of renewable energy.

So, the Crusades may not really be over, even though a thousand years have passed. Let us hope it does not take another thousand years to solve this dilemma.

Living Through the Blues

Sorry I have not posted lately. I have been down even further than usual. Can't explain it, life is as good/bad as it ever was. Went to the doc yesterday, and got some new meds. I can only hope that they will help me out of this hole I am in. I just don't seem to want to face the world.

Switching from my small world to the world of American politics, it has been quite an interesting month. Can the Bush folks do anything that isn't inept or purely politically motivated? And it seems that the Democratic controlled Congress has brought out the mea culpa side of the White House. Who would have thought that you would ever hear the WH saying that mistakes were made, in any way, shape or form. Now it just keeps happening.

Good news about the Federal Attorney scandal. Congress may be able to subpoena Karl Rove, to see how he was involved. How is it that one of his pals just happened to replace one of the fired attorneys? And there are even emails where the whole issue is discussed fairly openly. How ever did that happen? Can this be a new, more open White House, or one that is falling apart?

Switching to General PP, saying that gays are immoral. I do not want or expect that he should retract his statement. They are his own personal feelings, and he is entitled to them. I was glad to hear that he realized that he probably should not have expressed his opinions so publicly. Sure has opened up an interesting national conversation, with even some Republicans criticizing his opinion, and stating they disagree with him. Although Hillary was less than forthright at first when asked her opinion. She later came round in writing and said that she totally disagreed with Gen Pace. And the world just keeps getting more open to the gay discussion.

I hope all of you are doing better than I am. I long for the day when I want to be out among you all enjoying life to the fullest. Until then, keep me in your thoughts and prayers. Thanks guys.